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My husband and I are using all our free time getting everything done to move my mom into her assisted living apartment. The paperwork required is unbelievable, including everything from doctors, prescription meds, personal history, likes and dislikes, hobbies, daily activities, etc. We worked on it tonight until midnight. So exhausting. Tomorrow I have to deal with power of attorney issues, medical information gathering, and shopping for the basics, as well as going by her house to get some of the neccessities.

Every day from now on will be spent running here and there, trying to get it all done.  Endless requirements for a smooth transition. So much to do, and I’ve been having troubling chest pains. I feel the stress of it all, and I feel helpless to slow down, because I can’t. I am SOOOOOOO tired already, and the worst part is still to come. Doctor’s appointments, moving her to the temporary room, getting her furniture delivered to the permanent room, getting it decorated, buying the necessities, and moving the rest from her home, coordinating medication orders, care orders, etc. I won’t bore you with all of it, but it is massive. Please pray for my health, strength and peace. The last 3 1/2 years of my life have been so stressful.

I am so glad that none of us know when the journey ends, for that would take away the wonder of life, and the hope. It is so much better not to know, but to be aware that it WILL end; therefore, we need to live every day, in that reality. Lately, I want to breathe more deeply, laugh more heartily, and cry to the depths of my soul. I want to experience life in all its wonder.  It has become more meaningful to me in the last few years, because of my losses, and because of its relative brevity…

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  1. Sparkle, there is a lesson in your post today.You must promise to try to understand the importance of what I am going to write. You sound much like me, but in the last six years I have learned one thing–If I don’t take care of me and I get ill who will take care of my Mother.

    You can’t see this right now, but even if it takes another day or two days to get everything ready to move your Mother then it does. Promise you will take 2-4 hours off and do nothing–nothing at all. Go to the bedroom with whatever soothing drink you like, lay on the bed, enjoy the drink and clear your mind of anything you feel you “Have” to do. Then lay there and giggle or whatever you want, but don’t let yourself start worrying.

    The first time you do this you will have stomach pains and be all confused, but it will get better. I pushed so hard that 1 1/2 years ago I got to a point that I couldn’t sleep and my anti depressant didn’t even work. My doctor sent me to a sleep clinic and many other tests. He changed my antidepressant. I made sure everything was caught up one day and started my new antidepressants and when I went to bed I made myself not think. I also vowed that for 1 month I had to sleep 8 hours a night. Oh my I came up with every excuse I could, but then barked at myself and did what I had to. I found out I slept like a baby, still do, and learned that I do the very important first, then other things I as I can.

    Even to this day and right now, I have already decided the next two nights I am in that bed for a minimum of 8 hours.

    Lonnette, we don’t like this, but Momma can wait for 24 hours and she will listen and understand when you tell her that you are taking a day off from life to rest.

    Your husband will understand and probably be happy you are going to rest for the day.

    I can’t say it enough; please try
    Shoot all the excuses down
    Make yourself rest for at least a few hours.

    I hope you don’t think I am to forward. It just appears that you and I are duplicates, except that I have been there just before you.

    Take care Sparkle–You must!!

  2. Frank: I know you are right, and it seems that the circumstances won’t let me rest. I also have had major sleep disturbances since my dad died 3 1/2 years ago. It is from stress, and sometimes from just trying to find any “me” time. I stay up late just trying to have any time to myself.

    Again, I know that you are right. Please pray for me, that I will get my sleep schedule back on a normal track, and that I will find time to enjoy life once in awhile. I will try and do as you say. We DO sound a lot alike in our “perfectionism” and drive to please everyone. In the end, the only important thing is that God is pleased, and says, “Well done…” (Hopefully, I will begin to embrace this truth.)

    Thanks for your words of wisdom, Frank.


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