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Just when you think that it can’t get any stranger, it did. Yesterday they gave Betty breathing treatments and IV antibiotics for the pneumonia (Levaquin). She looked better when I saw her. As you know, she was admitted one night at midnight, stayed one full day and then last night.

This morning I woke up with an upset stomach-ran to the bathroom, and then got a message from Rob saying that my doctor in Panama City (who I will be seeing tomorrow) wanted me to run over to our local clinic and get a quick blood test, that could be faxed to her, so that she would have it when I go tomorrow.

So I headed out the door (feeling horrible, and with practically no sleep) to get that done. After getting the blood work done, I stopped by the grocery store, as everything here has gone by the wayside, with all the running to doctor’s offices, the ER, and the nursing home. Everything is falling down around me.

When I got home around 1:00 p.m., I called Betty to see how she was doing. Much to my shock, she said that she was being sent home. HOME, not back to the nursing home. I could not believe this. She had not even come near to finishing her rehab. The nursing home was holding her bed for her, and there was no question that she would return there to finish physical therapy. (Though last night when the nursing home was mentioned, she said, “I’m not going back there.”

She said she had been trying to reach all 3 of us-(Me, Rob, and Tony) but couldn’t get us. According to her all our phones were busy. I told her that I ran out this morning to the lab and grocery store, and forgot my phone. She said that she had been waiting since 9:30 a.m. to go home.  I told her I would come right there.

I called Rob, and we decided that we needed to make sure that her primary care physician, and the nursing home knew. Rob talked to the physical therapist at the nursing home, and she said that Betty was not near ready to go home yet, and that she would hurt herself badly putting full weight on the foot and leg, because she was slow to make progress with strengthening her upper body weight.

We put in a call to the nurse practitioner for her primary care doctor, but got no return call. Rob talked with the charge nurse on Betty’s floor, who said that the doctor- (Hospital Admitting Physician- who used to be Betty and Sam’s doctor for years,) had placed the order for her to go home. Rob asked to have that doctor call him, and he said that we were NOT taking her home, after what the physical therapist told us. We said that she needed to finish her physical therapy. (This was SO crazy-I can’t believe it!)

We ran over to her primary care physician’s office, and told his receptionist what was going on, and she said that since that doctor did not admit her, it was not up to him. I told her that she DID see her primary care doctor in the ER that night. (I’m not sure if he was working there that night, or why he showed up.) But Betty also saw the same doctor we saw on the night she first went to the ER, and he was the one that screwed up the diagnosis, and put the brace on the wrong leg, and sent her home.

So then we went rushing over to the hospital because the charge nurse said that the hospital doctor was going to come by and talk to Betty. We hoped to be there when he did. We waited and waited. I was so upset that I was having bad chest pains, and felt very weak physically and emotionally. Betty was still waiting on her bed all this time, not knowing that any of this was taking place. I knew that she would throw a fit if she didn’t get to go home, and my nervous system couldn’t take anymore. So I went to a nearby waiting area. Then the nurse told Rob that the hospital doctor (who signed the orders) would be calling him, instead of coming by.

He did, and Rob told him what the physical therapist said, and that she would be in horrible danger if she went home in her present condition, and that he was not taking her there. He told the doctor that I was sick and on the verge of collapse, and that we could not lift her if she fell, etc. (Tony was at home really sick with a horrible cold today. We had called to ask him if he was on board with us about her not coming home. We were ready to say that if he went and got her, then he would be responsible for what happened to her. But he agreed with us that she should not come home, until her therapy was finished.)

So the hospital doctor talked to Betty on the phone, and then he talked to Rob (in Betty’s presence.) He said that he was in agreement that she should go get the rest of her therapy, but that he could not force her to go back there. He said that if she was not incompetent, then she could still make decisions. He said that she had told him she did not want to go back to the nursing home.

Now let me stop right here and ask a question…She was admitted to the hospital primarily because she was having hallucinations, and also suspected pneumonia. Why do you ask a person in that condition if they want to go home? Of course, she would say yes. He did not handle this well at all.  I understand that she wants to go home, but she will not be safe at all right now. She was already in great peril before she broke her foot and leg, and now she is in MUCH greater danger.

The daughter of her roommate walked out to where I was and said, “Your mother is stubborn!” (This came as NO surprise to me. She is driving us all crazy!!!!!)

Rob told her that we loved her, but we did not want to get a call to come to her house, and find out she had hit her head or something worse. He said that he knew it might not seem like it right now, but we were wanting her to finish the therapy, because we all love her. He gave her hug.

She said that she would call Tony to come get her. (We had already talked to him, and he agreed with us.) Then she said Tony could move in with her. (That will just mean 2 more mouths to feed (him and Brandon, his son), and clothes to wash, and she still won’t have anyone there for the greater part of the day.) It is not the answer-though that is up to her. But it was not part of the equation today. 

The hospital doctor said to ask her what she would do if she fell (when he wasn’t there for his lunch break), and she said, “What if…what if…you could say that about anything…” She would NOT stop insisting on going home.

Some lady (I guess one of the social workers or a nurse) said that she should stay in the hospital tonight, and think about it. Rob came out to tell me what happened, and I was getting angry. She is killing me-she only thinks about herself and what she wants. She even said, “What good is it if I can’t do what I want?” (This is always her philosophy. It is ALWAYS about what she wants.)

As we were taking the elevator down, the charge nurse (I guess) said that the other lady finally convinced her to stay overnight at the hospital, and go for 10 more days of therapy.  (Only God knows if she’ll do it.)

I want to say again that I have had it. I cannot continue to handle her. If Rob hadn’t gotten off work today to go with me, I KNOW I would have had a nervous breakdown. I am very concerned about her, but she is stubborn, rebellious, and selfish. Enough is enough.

There is nothing I can do if she decides to go home. As long as she is deemed competent, she is allowed to make her own decisions. But this is not fair to me. I am sooooooo sick, and Rob told her that I couldn’t be at home with her now if she went, and that I needed a rest. She said that I was “about to go over the edge.” I guess she was referring to the words that Tony and I and (she and I) had. Well, if I am about to go over the edge, guess who pushed me? I’ve had it!!!!

I will be in Panama City tomorrow seeing my doctor. I am sure that I will have to go through heart tests now, if I mention chest pains, and I really wish I knew if I’m having panic attacks, or it is my heart. I have an irregular heartbeat (that is called benign) but with all this stress, I can feel it drop out a lot.  It is a scary feeling. Physically, I cannot do this any longer.

So at the moment, that is the story. What tomorrow will bring is anybody’s guess. I’ll keep you posted. We need your prayers…

Please see other articles that I have written here:


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