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If you ever question the reality of evil, just take a look at your nightmares. Only pure evil knows how to torture you to that degree. I had one of those nights last night. I saw every couple of hours on the clock. Seems like ever since I’ve been committed to correcting my sleep schedule, I’ve had sleepless or very difficult nights. As I said before, it’s truly a spiritual battle. So I finally fell asleep somewhere near the early morning light. And then it happened. The dream from hell.

Now my dream from hell is not likely to resemble yours, because what torments me, may not be what wrecks your nerves. Sometimes I think the dreams that are based somewhat in reality are the scariest, because they seem more believable, and so very real while they’re happening.

I care for my elderly, widowed mom, who is an insulin dependent diabetic, and lives alone (by her own choice.) It’s a somewhat precarious arrangement, but I have put every safeguard in place that I can, and I see her often, and talk to her daily. When my dad died, as most of you know, I became her primary caregiver, and I spent the first year (after his death) a basket case, thinking I had to keep her alive. I couldn’t sleep after my dad died, when I realized that I had inherited the responsibility of my mom. (I do have a brother who visits her daily on his lunch hour, but I am responsible for her doctors’ appointments, errands, hair appointments, medicines, etc.) But it has now been 3 years since my dad’s death, and I have calmed down about the care of my mom considerably. I know that only God can keep her alive, and that my job is to care for her the best that I can.

Early this morning, I dreamed that she and I checked into a hotel, and for some crazy reason, there was a couple that I did not know, already in the room, asleep in bed. We had barely stepped into the room, when my mother passed out, and crashed to the floor. In the dream, I immediately knew that it was low blood sugar, so I ran everywhere in the room, looking for orange juice, or something sweet. There was absolutely nothing, and I knew that time was short. For some reason, the couple in the room did not help me, so I flew out the door, and ran (for what seemed like miles) to the hotel office. There I found a man that I had known years ago-an elder in our church, working the front desk. I explained the problem, and together we ran toward the room. But the property was so large, that I could not remember which room it was. (We had barely stepped into the room when she passed out.) I started running everywhere, trying to find her. I even climbed large walls in this dream. In fact, I kept having to scale a very tall, difficult wall. I did everything I could to find her, but I couldn’t get to her. The man named Nate ran on ahead, still looking. Somehow, someone scanned my key, and discovered the room number. (Of course, the front desk would have known the room number all the time, but remember this is a dream.) I was still climbing the large wall, and could not find my mother.

Suddenly, my first cousin, Jack (who I was raised with until the age of 7) appeared, wearing dark shades and a ball cap. I was relieved to see him, but he had a strange look on his face. “Did they find her?”, I screamed frantically. He hesitated, and then shook his head (saying yes.) But not a moment later, he added, “She died.” My heart hurt as though I was having a heart attack, and at just that moment I woke up. I was trembling and shaking all over, just totally upset. It took me a few minutes to realize that I was back in my room, and that it had been a horrible dream. After I got over the shock of it all, I got mad.

Every single night since I have started my regimen to discipline myself, by going to bed at a decent hour, I have been harrassed in some way. First it was a sore throat, then it was vertigo. Yes, for 3 nights, every time that I turned over in bed, the room would spin. It was hell. Once I counted 5 rotations of my fan, and it wasn’t even on! (It must be either sinus, or an inner ear problem. I’ve only had this one other time in my life, following a bad cold.) Finally, yesterday, the dizziness went away, though my ear hurt a little. I went to bed, needing sleep so badly, because today I had to take my mom to a doctor’s appointment in a nearby town, about 2 hours away. It was going to be a rough day for sure, and a very tiring one. So at first I couldn’t go to sleep, no matter how I tried. I listened to a tape for awhile, and still couldn’t sleep. But I stayed there, and did not get up. (For me that was a huge victory.) Then, when I finally fell asleep by the dawn’s early light, I had that horrible nightmare.

I truly believe it is demonic harassment. Yes, I studied psychology..I majored in it! I know how the subconscious works. But the timing on all these ailments and dreams is very suspicious. I just have to stand strong.

I thought I would share with you, what I do when I have a dream like that. I am a Christian, and I pray the blood of Jesus over me, and over the dream. I bind up every vision, image and negative emotion that I experienced. I say that it is a lie, and will not come to pass. I cast away all fear and torment, and I speak out loud  that I will not remember, or be tormented by the dream.  I tell Satan to flee (because the Bible says to resist him, and he will flee), and I get up, and try not to dwell on it, because I believe that is what the enemy wants us to do. He wants to bring in fear, discouragement, and torment.

Think it sounds crazy? All I can tell you is that it works. Sometimes when you’re trying very hard to live your life for Christ, Satan will attack you in your dreams, because that is when you’re most vulnerable, and things are somewhat out of your control. I can tell you that my whole life is better, because I am changing my horrible sleep habits, and I am sure that every demon in hell is trying to stop this effort. But greater is He that is in me, than he that is in the world. And in the same way that an earthly father comforts his child after a bad dream, so my Heavenly Father is there to comfort me always…

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