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Since I often share the tears and stress with you, I wanted to also share the joy! I took my mom for the follow up of some medical tests, and the results were very good! One was a liver ultrasound because her liver enzymes were elevated for over a year. The doctor was very concerned, and had her take a blood test that day and then ordered an ultrasound. But much to our surprise, and with great thanks to God, almost everything had returned to the normal range on the liver enzyme test. There was a small cyst on the liver, but lots of people have them, and there was nothing there to worry about. And secondly, my mom had a brain MRI, due to being extremely off balance. But the news was good there also. She had previously had some ischemic attacks (TIAs). These are often referred to as mini-strokes. But looking at a comparison since 1999, all the report said was that they were a little more obvious than back then, but there was no sign of an infarction or a stroke. So that was good news, and I could tell that it made my mom very happy. 🙂 I asked the NP what caused her to be so off balance, and basically it is an aging brain. It is quite common in older people, and seems to continue over time, which is what makes it so sad when they refuse to use their walkers. One fall could drastically change their lives, and the lives of their caretaker.  She told the nurse practitioner, “I thought it was time to say my prayers.” (By this she meant to say farewell.) But the nurse practitioner said, “I think God’s gonna keep you around a while longer.”

It’s funny, my mom later said, “Well it looks like I’m gonna live longer than I wanted to.” (She really didn’t mean this quite the way it looks on paper.) She has always been afraid of getting really feeble, losing her eyesight (which is really bad already) and being incapacitated. (No, NOT decapitated.  🙂 Grin. Just a joke.) I told her, “Don’t worry about that for now. Let’s just thank the Lord that you got a good report today, and trust that He knows when the time is right for you. As long as you are enjoying life, and not suffering horribly, let’s be glad.”

It’s funny, since my dad died almost 3 years ago this coming May, I have actually been amazed at her will to live. I wondered (as did many others) if she would even try. But I do believe that my constant care and availability to her, has made a big difference in her life. We do have struggles at times, but we also laugh a lot. Sometimes we are like two kids, and it has been an amazing bonding time between us, since my dad passed. It has been very, very difficult in some ways, but also very touching in others. I know that I have done all that I could to make her life richer, and more fulfilling. I have had to learn what I can and cannot do. Counseling has helped so much. I learned I was not responsible for her happiness, and I always thought I was. She has a lot to do with her happiness and attitude. I also learned that I couldn’t do anything about the aging process, (as much as I would like to chase it away) and that there are so many things to deal with, and challenges to face. I have learned (and am learning daily) so much about elder care, and the importance of disability aids. I never knew these things before, and I have much greater compassion for all that the elderly have to deal with.  I wish I could be an advocate for them in some way, before I am old myself. I have always loved elderly people, even since I was a little girl. Maybe it comes from being raised by my grandparents (alongside my mom) until I was 7 years old. (My parents divorced when I was 2. My mom remarried on my seventh birthday.)

As the years passed, and I watched my grandparents age, I saw the struggles they faced with grace and determination, and sometimes just plain true grit. And I will never forget their courage, and persistence when the going was tough.

So that’s it for today. Good news, what a blessing…

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  1. LONNIE, I am so happy for you , finally some good news WOW were you the woman that needed that !! You sound so much better, I am so glad to hear a little continment in your post. Once again love the video. I wrote LINDA today also , you two are my morning coffee & insriration for the day ,LOVE THE VIDEOS !!!! It was 8 months for me SAT., really rough day, but i am trying really HARD to concentrate on good memories ,It is gonna take alot more work , but i am trying harder . Sure glad you are feeling some what better. ALWAYS HERE FOR YOU MY FRIEND , YOU HAVE HELPED ME SO MUCH, I WILL BE FOREVER GRATFUL !!!! LOVE & PRAYERS SANDY SHANES MOM

  2. Thanks Sandy! Yes, a little good news is a bright spot these days. I am finally coming out of the horrible fog that I’ve been in. If only I could learn not to let things get to me WHILE I’m going through it, but being human means things hurt, right? I think that whole episode only hurt SO much because I love all of the people there with all my heart, and was so devoted to them. And also I felt that I was owed so much more from the owner, after my complete loyalty to his site for a long time. It took a toll on me for sure.
    I’m still not feeling great physically, but things are improving emotionally every day.
    Bless your heart. I was thinking how much you have been through in just a few months. Two major losses of people that meant the whole world to you. (Don’t ever let anyone diminish the separation from Austy either. It’s a huge loss.) You are remarkable to withstand all that you have been through. I’m here for you also! I miss you so much! But we’ll be able to talk even more now, hopefully! I love your emails, and I thank you for reading my blog. Love and Hugs-Lonnette (Lonnie)

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